I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize
