Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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