Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
