32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
