I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I said "one day" and that day is not today
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
