Too much gin, very little bucket
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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