we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
