What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
