If that was your dad, he is hot
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
