No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Randomize
