i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
