I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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