How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
