Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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