HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
