The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Well I just put wine in my tea
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
