Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
