garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize