My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize