Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
