My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize