Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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