no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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