Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
