Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize