great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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