I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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