Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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