People with herpes should wear stickers.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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