Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
