dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
