with your own penis?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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