and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
