I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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