We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
we're so committed to being not committed
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
