i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
