I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
