DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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