Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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