Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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