If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
