I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
