Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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