Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
