all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
