I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
