Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
