My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
