About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
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