Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
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