Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
